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What a sad situation. email this discussion to a friend?

myLot reputation of 96/100. Lifez2short (1411)   ranked 290 out of 8,851 in friend2 years ago

I learned today that a very close friend of mine is very sick. Her mother called me crying and told me that her daughter was forcing herself to throw up after meals. And thats only when she eats cause she wont eat anymore either. Her mom begged her to eat something a slice of bread or something anything please. So I guess to get her mom off of her back she ate bread and peanut butter. Well her mother heard her in the bathroom within 2 or 3 minutes of eating it making herself throw up. I had no idea she was doing this and now I'm very worried about her. I knew she had been struggling with her weight but not like this at all. Is there anything as a friend I can do to help her?

 
 
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StrawberryKisses (1331) response was accepted on 5/28/2007.
denotes best response.
tags:  bulimia, sick, illness, friend, sad
 
1. myLot reputation of 84/100. StrawberryKisses (1331)   ranked 1,488 out of 8,851 in friend   2 years ago

I would say just try to be there for her. Maybe tell her you know and just tell her that when she wants to accept what she is doing that you will be there to help her get through it. Even if shes is upset you know she will come to realize that you are just trying to help. If she doesn't want any help at all i would suggest to her mother that putting her in rehab would be the best thing for her. All you can do is be there.


myLot reputation of 96/100. Lifez2short (1411)   ranked 290 out of 8,851 in friend  2 years ago

I have not decided if I want to tell her I know yet. I am very worried about her and will always be here for her no matter what.


myLot reputation of 84/100. StrawberryKisses (1331)   ranked 1,488 out of 8,851 in friend  2 years ago

just make sure she knows it even if you decide to not tell her you know. This disease can make people think all kinds of weird things so just assure her ok and good luck I hope she can get better soon


myLot reputation of 96/100. Lifez2short (1411)   ranked 290 out of 8,851 in friend  2 years ago

Yeah so do I.

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2. myLot reputation of 88/100. skewedsolipsism (162)   ranked 4,348 out of 8,851 in friend   2 years ago

As a friend, you can only support her and not try to force her to do anything - forcing her will only cause her to withdraw and push you away. Just let her know you're there for her if she wants support or needs to get help!


myLot reputation of 96/100. Lifez2short (1411)   ranked 290 out of 8,851 in friend  2 years ago

Yes that is pretty much all I can do.

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3. myLot reputation of 95/100. LittleMel (5514)   ranked 1,826 out of 8,851 in friend   2 years ago

I'm not sure which one is the right medical terms but this sounds like either bulimia or anorexia symptoms. I am naturally skinny I can't eat much since I've never done so, but in the girl's case she used to eat but now she doesn't eat anymore. She needs to see a doctor if not she'll lose nourishment and she could die.


myLot reputation of 96/100. Lifez2short (1411)   ranked 290 out of 8,851 in friend  2 years ago

I know but she will not agree that has a problem.

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4. myLot reputation of 96/100. curvychick77 (1053)   ranked 415 out of 8,851 in friend   2 years ago

Talk to her and listen to what she has to say. You mentioned she is struggling with weight loss, so that is one reason she is doing it. She may feel her weight is too much and in order to lose or not to gain any more she vomits after she eats. She is bulimic and she also sounds a little anorexic as well. Yes, one can have both. I was once bulimic and I struggled a lot, I didn't vomit but I did use laxatives, which is just as bad. I got help thorugh friends and family.
In her case she needs more than just friends and family, since obviously family is not helping. You need to talk to her and her mother about getting her some help, in fact just talk to her mother about it. If she gets upset with you for it, then just tell your friend that it is for the best and that you worry about her and you only want her to feel better. If your friend continues on this path, she will die early. So now is the time to get help for her. Do it! Don't think about it. Help her, talk to her be there for her and get her help soon. I'll keep her and you in my prayers.

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5. myLot reputation of 93/100. maddysmommy (10737)   ranked 30 out of 8,851 in friend   2 years ago

Is there anyway you can talk to your friend without hurting her feelings? I mean is she one that might listen to you? or come to you for advice? or even just for a chat? the reason I ask this is because maybe she might open up to you about how she is feeling about her weight and all. If you approach her in a way that she won't take offense and maybe tell her that you have noticed certain changes in her behavior, or her body weight, or emotions or something along those lines just to get her talking and possibly opening up a little. I'm sure she will be in denial and will probably get upset at you but if you approach it in a way where she feels comfortable talking to you or may appear to open up, then maybe that's a start. I would research more into eating disorders and possibly find out if there are people in your area that could help her. It's going to take some time for her to realise what she is doing to herself and maybe with your support and friendship, in time you might be able to get her the help she needs. I don't really know what else to say as I have not been in this situation before. I hope she finds help.

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6. myLot reputation of 97/100. retardedrugrat (3675)   ranked 135 out of 8,851 in friend   2 years ago

If she's forcing herself to throw up, she's bulimic and there's not a whole lot you can do. She will see herself as fat and gross looking, even if she's not, and no amount of anyone saying she looks awesome will change that. To fight this, she needs professional help.

However, as a friend, you can be there for her. Be the shoulder she may want to cry on, be the ear she may want for someone to listen, and be the eyes to try and look out for her. Be supportive, and don't try to force her to do anything. That will only make her withdraw and push you away from her. Being a supportive friend at this time may just make her realize what she's doing.

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7. xwh_2310 (14)   ranked 3,327 out of 8,851 in friend   2 years ago

I think that is a very bad manner to light the weight.You had better to advise your friend to go to the hospital,and ask the doctor the right way.If her situation become worse,maybe she will get the sick of anorexia.The illness can cause the people walk to the death.

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8. myLot reputation of 79/100. eyewitness (1141)   ranked 2,899 out of 8,851 in friend   2 years ago

I think it's better to get some help from an outsider.A therapist know how to handle this situations.You can try and talk to her but she's making this choice and it's hard to get this over.I've had a friend too luckily i was able to help her,but it's not easy.It can break you,because mentally it's heavy.I think in her case it's important to get professionel help.Her self-esteem isn't good and a professionel can help her to recover her self-esteem.

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9. singhtaj (6)   ranked 4,420 out of 8,851 in friend   2 years ago

Don't worry! Treat her as a very good friend. First of all, stop scolidng her for anyhting and let her do what she want to do for atleast 3-4 days. Just ask her once, if she want to have anything else. If she says no, then don't force her. She will see this change and will try to know that why are you not forcing her like before. Then, explain her as a very good friend that if parents never think bad for their children. I understand that you want to reduce but if you will not take balanced diet it may hamper your health. Leaving everything will not make you slim. If you will not take proper diet you may cause with someserious illness. Rather than following this way it is better for you to start doing exercises, be always happy and stop worrying. And on the top I am with you. . . . . .


myLot reputation of 96/100. Lifez2short (1411)   ranked 290 out of 8,851 in friend  2 years ago

I will try.

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10. xwh_2310 (14)   ranked 3,327 out of 8,851 in friend   2 years ago

I think that is a very bad mannet to light the weight.You had better to advise your friend to go to the hospital,and ask the doctor the right way about this case.If her situation become worse,maybe she will get the sick of anorexia.The illness can cause the people walk to the death.

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