So mad...update on the house...family backstabber

Oh, I know. THat's what I keep thinking too...if this really is the right house for us it will happen, if we don't get this house it means it really wasn't the one for us. The housing market around here is just so hard right now...either they are way too expensive or they are cheap but beyond repair or super small. They can afford more than we can, they aren't well off but they both have jobs plus a small home business...and at least they have a place of their own right now even if they don't like it very much.

i hear that. We have been looking.. well i have been looking.. mostly for fun right now and to get an idea of prices and stuff.. wow. its hard to find anything ideal under 200,000 here. ouch. except mobile homes. which would be okay.. as long as it where not in a trailor park. lol. i cant allow myself to live in a park. that's wrong on so many levels.

Yeah, I guess I shouldn't have...I just thought I could trust him as close as we all are plus I was tired of him asking us to buy his place. I know we're desperate for a place of our own but his place is a bit beyond the level I would sink to to get out of here.

I know...and I could deal with it if it was just 'someone else' trying to buy it too, that's the risk everyone takes when trying to buy a home. I'm just mad that it's them and that they didn't even know about the house until I told him we were trying to buy it. Plus they have all kinds of help with buying a house and could afford one that cost more. This is the only one I've found that we could afford and was big enough for our family and I have been looking for nearly two years.

I have never looked for a house myself. I am so betting on your getting what you deserve. Don't be upset your looking will find you a blessing they missed out on. Stop stressing over them having help or being ahead of you. Something could happen to back track all of their work. Stay focused on the house being your dream. Take your emotions off that house and just file the papers. Good luck to you..

The only thing I keep hoping for is that- this isn't the first time they've claimed to be buying a house...I remembered that after I calmed down...so maybe they'll change their minds about this one too. ANd yes, I think in their minds we are their way out of their trailer. THey want out, they know how desperate we are, they think eventually we'll break down and buy their trailer. WEll, we have 8 kids total, 4 living with us, what are we going to do with a small 2 bedroom trailer!?

-Maybe I'll remind them about all the work that needs to be done before anyone can even move in...if they want out of the trailer park so soon this is not the house for them. From what I know, the best case scenario would have us moving in just in time for school to start since our oldest child together starts kindergarten in the fall and the house is a different elementary school (same district) than where we are now. And even then we'd probably only have the bare minimum done...it's not really that bad but the town switched to public water and sewer since the house was last lived in and that will be a big expense right of the bat and then the kitchen will need some work...and that will take us probably right up to August. Project 3 will be a furnace before winter and THEN we can get to the fun stuff finally.

No we haven't made an offer and that's what's stressing me out so much about this.

See our plan up until this house got listed was to just find a place to rent while we built up our down payment a little more because we figured we wouldn't find a house for under $60,000. Well this house listed for 32,500...so we almost have the down payment but we hadn't bothered to get prequalified for a mortgage because we thought we were a long way from that point. That's what we've spent this whole week doing because the agency won't even let us look at the house until we're prequalified.

But THEY have her parents money behind them so if needs be her parents can just buy it and then wait for them to get a mortgage themselves. And yeah, I'll have a hard time speaking to them...unless of course it's to invite them over to MY house so the kids can play and have room to run around since they can go more than 10 feet in their trailer without running into a wall or furniture...

When are you going to prequalify? A lot of place will do that over the phone.

Did they actually put in the offer?

Hopefully as soon as s/o gets home today. They needed to speak with him in person before they could do the credit check and his work hours ran over just enough this week that he didn't get home in time. Today is supposed to be a normal day though...so we should know within the hour.

Thanks for the kind words terri! You are so right.

Nope, this cousin and s/o are more like brothers, both of them, along with another cousin that died a few years ago, were like the 3 musketeers growing up. All 3 were the outcasts of their respective families so they always looked out for each other...until now apparently.

He will be home from work any minute now so I will tell him then. I kind of worry what his reaction will be...he's more forgiving than I and I'm afraid that because of their relationship he may say we should back off and let them have the house.

I am so sorry foxyfire, my husband is the same way, always looking out for the other guy, but not his family..

I hope he takes a different outlook on this, because I know how much you wanted that house..

That's the part that's bothering me so much, had it been any other family member I wouldn't have said a word about the house until we had signed papers in our hands but I really trusted this one (see above comments about their relationship). The really sick part...if we got the house and they still needed a better place, we would have been willing to share it with them (it's really big) but today when he told me about them looking into it, I reminded him it was the same house we wanted and was like "well the four of us can buy it together"...and he just went off about how her parents are going to help so they don't need help getting the mortgage.

You said it perfectly Goodie. "asshat"- I like that word, I'll have to remember that.

Sneaky is right! And I know he knew it was the same house because I'd told him everything about it and there are only 2 houses currently for sale in that town and the other one is over $100,000 so there's no way we'd be trying to buy that one. And then he calls and acts like he had no idea...ugh! Right now I'm hoping that he loses his job again or something as bad as that sounds...I want this house, or at least don't want them to have it to rub in my face all the time.