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myLot reputation of 98/100. katsmeow1213 (1697)   ranked 48 out of 18,108 in relationships4 months ago

How long do you think you should know a person before you get married?
How long did you know your spouse before you married them?

 
 
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tags:  marriage, relationship, fast, getting married, know a parner
 
1. myLot reputation of 93/100. gemini_rose (7982)   ranked 835 out of 18,108 in relationships   4 months ago

I was with my hubby for 2 years before we got married, I dont think that I was really ready then, in fact the smile on my face in my wedding photos says it all really. I just kind of went along with the pressure off my parents to do it. I think they were petrified that I would split from him and end up a single parent of two kids instead of one.


myLot reputation of 98/100. katsmeow1213 (1697)   ranked 48 out of 18,108 in relationships  4 months ago

My son was 4 years old when hubby and I started dating. My twins were 6 months old when we got married. When I became pregnant for the twins his family put a lot of pressure on us to get married, and even went so far as to plan the entire wedding. I was raised differently. I was raised to believe it was okay to have children without marriage, so their antics really frustrated me. We got married because we wanted to, in our own time.

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2. myLot reputation of 82/100. cryw0lf (190)   ranked 1,414 out of 18,108 in relationships   4 months ago

You should get married when you're ready, most people advise around the 3-4 year mark because then you KNOW what your spouse is like, or you should do, so you know whether it would be the right choice to marry him/her.- But its totally up to you. 100% your choice, so make the right one, dont feel rushed, take all the time you want.


myLot reputation of 98/100. katsmeow1213 (1697)   ranked 48 out of 18,108 in relationships  4 months ago

Oh I'm already married. Have been for 5 years now. I'm just wondering what other people think. I too think you should know your spouse for awhile, but 3-4 years seems like a very long time. I would say more like 1-2 years.


myLot reputation of 82/100. cryw0lf (190)   ranked 1,414 out of 18,108 in relationships  4 months ago

Yeah to be honest i thought 3-4 years is a bit long, personally. And i wrote that as if i was advising you, didnt mean so though:P just couldnt be bothered to sort my sentencing out. Lol

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3. myLot reputation of 97/100. jesbellaine (2333)   ranked 511 out of 18,108 in relationships   4 months ago

As for me, as long as we both feel that we are ready to commit into a lifetime relationship then that is the time we can get married. Cheers!

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4. myLot reputation of 80/100. Marleysa (2781)   ranked 691 out of 18,108 in relationships   4 months ago

I think once again this would be different for different people. I knew my husband one month and got married and we are nine years,going for ten soon, married now and very happy. I knew my ex husband 2 years before we got married and that didn't obviously last long. I know some peope who knew each other many years before getting married and they got divirced within the first 6 years and others vice versa..it depends on so many things, I THINK:)


myLot reputation of 98/100. katsmeow1213 (1697)   ranked 48 out of 18,108 in relationships  4 months ago

Congrats to you happy

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5. myLot reputation of 85/100. barbie84 (2142)   ranked 509 out of 18,108 in relationships   4 months ago

i was with my hubby two years before we got married and 5 years on we are still going strong


myLot reputation of 98/100. katsmeow1213 (1697)   ranked 48 out of 18,108 in relationships  4 months ago

happy Great for you! Congrats

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6. myLot reputation of 99/100. vicki2876 (2421)   ranked 313 out of 18,108 in relationships   4 months ago

I have been with the same man for 12 years and I am still not ready to get married. LOL Honestly I think it depends on the people. Even though we haven't married I moved 2000 kms away from my home to be with him after only a month of knowing each other which kinda sounds nuts if one of my children now were to do it. So I really don't think it matters how long but rather are you ready to do it.


myLot reputation of 98/100. katsmeow1213 (1697)   ranked 48 out of 18,108 in relationships  4 months ago

So basically you are living a married life, but without the paper work. I know many couples who do this.

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7. myLot reputation of 88/100. GreenMoo (1925)   ranked 507 out of 18,108 in relationships   4 months ago

I don't think there's a right or wrong answer to this one. I do think though that the younger you are, the longer you should know your potential spouse before you tie the knot. As you get older you gain a better understanding of who you are and what you want, so you can better recognise if someone else is liable to be able to supply it. You're also liable to change less yourself once you're a bit older.


myLot reputation of 98/100. katsmeow1213 (1697)   ranked 48 out of 18,108 in relationships  4 months ago

So perhaps I should have asked, how old instead of how long? happy


myLot reputation of 88/100. GreenMoo (1925)   ranked 507 out of 18,108 in relationships  4 months ago

Personally I think you need to be at least 25, but that's still young.

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8. myLot reputation of 95/100. honeydew82174 (1245)   ranked 370 out of 18,108 in relationships   4 months ago

happy It seems to me with the divorce rate as high as it is I would wait at least 5 years and if I could still stand the person I would marry them. I was married once before so I would wait. My parents knew each other for two months and got married and are still together. I really think it depends on the people. I personally would wait because it truly will not hurt anything.


myLot reputation of 98/100. katsmeow1213 (1697)   ranked 48 out of 18,108 in relationships  4 months ago

Your parents were raised under different morals than people have today. My husband's parents are the same way. I don't know how long they dated before marrying, but they are still together, although their marriage is not happy. They were raised not to believe in divorce.

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9. myLot reputation of 45/100. GloomCookieLex (2118)   ranked 2,917 out of 18,108 in relationships   4 months ago

I was with my husband for over 4 years before we actually got married. We were engaged for two years.

I think it should be no less than two years before you get married, but the longer you wait, the better. It's best to be sure, I think.


myLot reputation of 98/100. katsmeow1213 (1697)   ranked 48 out of 18,108 in relationships  4 months ago

This is true. If you're spending the rest of your lives together, why rush things?


myLot reputation of 45/100. GloomCookieLex (2118)   ranked 2,917 out of 18,108 in relationships  4 months ago

I see it more as making sure you actually want to spend the rest of your lives together. Things happen, people change, you learn new things about the other person, somethings you just can't live with. I'd rather take the time to be sure I can live with him.

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10. jmlcabular (70)   ranked 10,317 out of 18,108 in relationships   4 months ago

I am still single but in a relationship right now for almost 2 years.
Anyway, based on a tv show that I have watched, a couple should be able to stay in a relationship of "boyfriend and girlfriend" for a minimum 2 to 3 years before they get married. It is only during these years that a person will be able to see the negative side of his or her partner. If that person can accept the bad side of his/her partner, then it is the only time that they should settle down and have a family.


myLot reputation of 98/100. katsmeow1213 (1697)   ranked 48 out of 18,108 in relationships  4 months ago

You shouldn't base your choices on a TV show.. but you are right, getting to know your partner really well before entering into a lifelong commitment is a good idea.

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