A letter Instead of Fighting...

I think it is a great idea to write letter. I think it will help communication problems alot. Yes I understand u.

Everyone has different methods for communicating. I'm glad that you and your husand found one that works or you. My husband knows hat he can tell me anything AS LONG AS HE TELS ME CALMLY, and that I can tell him anything calmly. I can no communicate with someone when their voice is raised.

Writing is a good tool, but you shouldn't rely on that. You should be able to tell him things - in an non confrontation manner - and not argue about them. They key is how you word your sentences - without blame and pointing fingers.

Writing a letter is ok, but communication needs to be in person, because letters can be misinterpreted. Letters do not express the in-person effect of sincerity, emotion and the personal human factor.
Letters are OK for a start, but relationships really do take actual communication.
This is of course is based on that the two people are in the same house.

I prefer speaking with my other by phone or in-person over an email or handwritten letter....doesnt matter what it is about, good or bad.

Obviously the fact that you are here indicates that writing is one way that you are capable of communicating in this manner. If you are writing you have the opportunity to respond or tell someone what you are thinking from a calmer state of mind and without anger. You have the opportunity of thinking about what you want to say and if it comes out wrong you have the opportunity to retract or re-phrase the comment. But sometimes in the heat of the moment we can say hurtful things and once its said you can't take it back. Even when you apologize, the other person still remembers what you have said in anger. That is why sometimes people feel that verbal abuse is worse than physical abuse, because shortly after the hit the pain goes away, but what a person says to you verbally always twirls in your head.

You have to find the best way that will work for you and your husband. It would be pretty alarming to me if already you have communication problems of this magnitude that you are fussing and fighting so early in your marriage. Hopefully you can find something that works really fast.

I like the idea of writing especially for some one like me who does not express my self too well and tend to hold problems in and the blow up at my spouse

Yes, it is a good way to start comunicating, opening and soon you will feel comfortable enough to open up face to face without all the fighting and poison that sometime we say for the people we love the most. I know when I need to melt the man I love on downpoints in our relationship I am sending him email or sms messages 'cause it is easy for me not to be interruped in the middle by any remark.. and just say what I feel with no fear. it seems like you have a good husband and a lot of love between you two. goodluck.

p.s - the picture of the letter you placed here isn't a love letter..I think. you can see their that it's an exchange of letters between zigmund froid and his daughter anna or a patient he had named anna.

Communication is always going to be a problem. Its how you can accept the problem and "work" around it that makes the difference. A letter is a great method, especially if the next conversation is going to be a fight no matter what. Some times it's not what the conversation is about it's just the way one person is feeling at the moment that can set things off, and some non interactive communication is just the thing. I guess an email could work just as well but it lacks the personal touch that pen and paper deliver.

I've been having similar problems in my marriage lately and our family Doc recommended a book. It might be worth a read. Just check Amazon for "Love and Respect"

Writing a letter is a good way to open up a discussion about many things, this way a person has a chance to say whats on thier mind and the feelings they have without being interuppted, and it gives the other person a chance to think about it before just jumping in and saying a bunch of stuff that later on can't be taken back. A letter leads to a real heart to heart talk sometimes, and that can be a good thing.

That is great your husband thought ahead in plan by writing you a letter instead of picking a fight. I think this is a much better way of doing things. I think mre people should do it this way. I wish I had the guys that I once were seeing at different tims do this. I am better at jotting down my thought on paper than I am actually faceing the person in all actualality. I do hope this help the communicatio between the both of you alot more.